The Secret to Getting Motivation with Depression

So you're depressed, unmotivated, and simply can't get yourself to do the things you want and need to do. By the end of this video. You'll know why motivation is so elusive for you and what to do about it.

Watch the video below, or read on for the full transcript.

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This topic came up when one of my clients asked the following inside my coaching membership discord server. Why do you guys think we stop ourselves from doing creative projects? I have started and restarted so many times, or I want to do my creative projects when I'm not home. Then when I get home, I look at it and I don't do it. As for my answer to this client's question: it might surprise you.

So lets get started. First of all, I want to get something off my chest. So often when people say they want to do something, but they don't actually do it, they're told some version of this quote by Jim Roan: If you really want to do something, you'll find a way. If you don't, you'll find an excuse. This couldn't be further from the truth because the more we want something, the more meaningful it is to us, the more resistance we're likely to experience and the more we're likely to procrastinate.

Okay. Now that we've got that out of the way, there are so many things that can contribute to the kind of resistance and procrastination my client described in their question: burnout, overwhelm, exhaustion, fear, physical illness, mental illness, trauma, neurodivergence, and cultural expectations. If expectations don't align with our integrity, for example, we subconsciously avoid meeting those expectations because deep down we know they're not right for us and/or avoid doing what is right for us because we feel obligated to meet those external cultural expectations in spite of how wrong they feel.

Sometimes it's as simple as believing that you need to want to do something that you need to actively feel that desire in order to get started. But in truth, motivation comes after taking action. Now it's likely that you've heard some version of that before, that motivation comes after taking action, that it comes from taking action. Trouble is, without more information, that advice tends to leave you right back where you started: wanting to do something, but unable to start. If you can relate, let me know down in the comments.

So let's expand upon the idea that motivation comes after taking action. For those of us who experience what can feel like insurmountable amounts of resistance and procrastination, motivation often comes not only after taking action, but also after making taking action habit, AKA you take action consistently. The motivation in this context is the motivation to keep going.

Why is that distinction important? Let's define motivation in a new way. Why would someone want to do, be, or have anything? Simply put, because they know what doing, being, or having that something would be like, and they want that experience to become real. In order to want to do something, you need to have the capacity to imagine doing it and imagine feeling good because of it.

For those of us trying to do something new or different. And for those of us with mental illness, trauma, or neurodivergence, it's very difficult to imagine this, regardless of whether that's just how your brain works or you're trying to do something you've never done before, the imagining part is really hard. If you can't imagine and embody what it will be like to experience having done or achieved something, the doing itself becomes a very, very bitter pill to swallow. Your inner critic steps in and convinces you that it's not worth trying in the first place. Whereas if you can imagine what it will be like, that becomes the motivation, the spoonful of sugar to help the medicine go down.

That's why the action needs to come first because then you get to experience firsthand what it feels like to have done something. And if it feels good, that's a little sugar to put in the pantry for next time. String together enough of those via habit, via consistency, and you will always have plenty of motivation to help the medicine go down.

Long story short, this whole motivation debacle is why I created Butt In Chair Time. It's a tool set you can use regardless of the cause of your resistance so you can start taking action now instead of spending time and effort trying to figure out why you're not taking action in the first place, you can access my Butt In Chair Time masterclass for free by going to the this link and signing up.

Check out this video next if you want to hear where Butt In Chair Time came from. Spoiler, I was depressed and doing nothing for almost a decade until I figured out Butt In Chair Time, freed myself from my very own personal Groundhog day.

If you liked this video, hit that like button and subscribe, and be sure to share it with your friends. I'll be back next week with another video. See you then. Bye.